Attempts To Reattach Rapper’s Penis Unsuccessful

Andre Johnson, the rapper who cut off his penis before jumping off the second-floor balcony of his North Hollywood apartment – has lost his member for good.wutang Attempts To Reattach Rappers Penis Unsuccessful

Johnson, who raps by the name Christ Bearer, was rushed into surgery in an attempt to save his severed penis, however that effort has failed, say doctors familiar with the situation.

The baffled neighbors said no one in the apartment was doing “any hard drugs that would cause him to do such a thing.”source

Neighbors told the website that Johnson managed to get back on his feet after taking the plunge from his balcony shortly before 1 a.m.

Move Over Jersey Shore Hello K-Town

Produced by Tyrese, so far K-Town has only been released on the internet, however, the reality show, featuring kooky Asian American youngsters is expected to get picked up by a studio any second. The cast consists of 4 girls and 4 guys, and promises to outdo Jersey Shore in all categories, muscles, high hairdos, clubbing and most importantly drama.

Here are some pictures fresh from the set. Okay so were casting agents intentionally trying to mirror Jersey Shore’s look and feel only with a slight slant or what?!

Shaq Vs Michael Phelps in the Pool

Shaq’s new reality show pits the basketball superman against other sports greats in what will easily prove to be a fun watch. Michael Phelps, the pot smoking, smoking fast, Olympic superstar, will be the Shaq’s first opponent, but not on the basketball court, in the pool.

Although “Shaq Vs.” surely is a “Wouldn’t miss it for the world reality romp,” it’s not hard for me to prognosticate a winner, that is IF it ends up being a straight-up swim-off.

Even suspended in water, Shaq, at 300 pounds and over 7 feet tall, would be a brick and in a contest with the swimming swan Phelps, it would be a blood bath, however, if some shenanigans are implemented to hinder Phelps, like, Phelps must swim with 3 supermodels on his back to make up for the weight difference, then anything is possible.

Tough Times, Starbucks Stops Serving Milk

Got Milk? The answer at Starbucks is “No.” What’s next? No pickles on my McDonalds Hamburger? In a stunning sign of the tough economic times and after cutting hundreds of jobs, Starbucks posted this letter in hundreds of Starbucks nationwide.

After I took this photo, a Starbucks employee abruptly told me “no pictures allowed.” I got my shot and my coffee; however, if you want decaf after 12:00 pm you will most likely have to wait as Starbucks is also halting freshly brewed decaf and bold coffees after 12:00 pm. It seems like coffee may be just what the doctor ordered for a more than sluggish economy. A visit to Starbucks rival “Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf” revealed no visible changes to their services.