UPSTATE NY DA: ‘Alright Already, I Admit It, I Was A 1970s Adult Star’

Cue the Adult movie music. The district attorney in upstate New York has finally admitted that he was in fact a 1970s Adult movie star.

Mark Suben, the DA in a county near Syracuse, has been lying his ass off since 2008 about any involvement in the adult movie business but now he is finally coming clean.

Suben apologized and admitted to using “bad judgment” obviously referring to that incredibly bad hooded costume, guy-liner and equally bad “oh” face.

“Recently materials have been circulated alleging that I was involved in the adult film industry about 40 years ago in New York. Those allegations are true,” he said. “I was an actor in adult films for a short period in the early 70s. I was also an actor in other venues including off Broadway, soap operas and commercial advertisements.”

A local TV station in Syracuse revealed that Subin worked under the adult name, Gus Thomas, in an investigative report.

“A few weeks ago, when asked, I denied this to members of the press,” Suben said. “I regret that and I apologize for it. I was shocked and embarrassed to be confronted with this so many years later. I was embarrassed for my family and friends who have stood by me. I also denied my actions to my family, my friends and my staff.”

Gus Thomas starred in films classics such as “Lecher,” and “The Love Witch.”

A spokesman for the district attorney said he will not resign.